Friday, March 28, 2008

Swan reunited with beloved paddleboat


MUENSTER, Germany - Petra the black swan has been reunited with her beloved swan-shaped paddleboat after a failed romance with a real bird.

Officials at a Muenster zoo where Petra has been spending the winter took her to a nearby lake Friday and released her next to the paddleboat — shaped like a giant white swan.

Petra became so attached to the boat back in 2006 that she refused to leave its side. When winter came around, she and the boat were taken into the zoo.

In recent months, Petra had struck up a relationship with a real white swan. However, he abandoned her last weekend — and officials decided to reunite her with the boat, which was returned to its owner only last week.

Zoo director Joerg Adler said it was too early to tell whether Petra will stay with the boat this time.

Link to Yahoo original story

I've been following this love story. Makes me feel like there is hope in the world for love!


Tuesday, March 25, 2008

My acceptance speech for being on the Ignore list going around.

First, I'd like to thank God. I'd like to thank my mother for giving birth to me, my dad for supplying the sperm. My brother with whom I discuss all thing gadgets. I'd like to thank my Chihuahuas for giving me the will to go on. I'd like to thank DU. OMG I can't believe I forgot to thank DU. I mean without DU this would never have happened. I mean God, DU, you're my rock. My foundation.
OMG did I forget to thank the Obama supporters? Oh, well, without the Obama supporters there wouldn't even have been a list for me to be on. I mean, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. I'm so proud to be considered for the Ignore list. The fact that you took the time and effort to craft the list and to consider me, well let's say it is an honor.

I will do my best to live up to the honor of being on the list. I will work hard to make it to the top 10 who are targeted for banning. That would be the ultimate achievement.

Oh, and I'd like to thank Skinner and the Admins, the mods, the web, Stargate SG-1, Vin Diesel my husband and his body for giving me the workout I need to feel strong enough to come to DU everyday and give it my all.

Honey, Vin Diesel, this is for you!

GREAT JOB Guys!

You've withstood the lockstep and retained your individuality. For that, I hold my drink up to you.

TELLURIAN
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Monday, March 24, 2008

Apparently panties and tighty whities are in a bunch all over the WWW

Especially on the Liberal and Progressive forums. Who said Liberals can't match Freepers and Conservatives @ eating their own. From what I've seen it is a pretty equal one -on-one match on eating your own Liberal and Progressive vs Freeper and Conservative.

I think posting on Liberal and Progressive political boards has jumped the shark. I think just about all of them have lost their fucking minds. I've decided I don't want to be a part of that crazy ass shit. The decline of Liberalness and Progressive mentality on the WWW was swift and complete. The destruction was awesome. They've made it so that it is embarassing to say you post on the Liberal sites. I think the rise of the Independent is where it is at.

I was always struck by Liberals and Progressives refusing to lockstep behind an idea or a candidate. But then I see just that where Obama is concerned. Obama is just that, a politician who talks out of both sides of his mouth just like all the other muthafuckas out there. He's no different, he's just black and that ain't different enough from where I stand. From what I see, Obama's supporters will be the ones to sink his ship. I can't see how OBama can beat McCrazy fuck in the GE. I hear all the yes we can, hope, change, let it sink, and all I see it as is bullshit. Bullshit, Bullshit, Bullshit. OMG. BULLSHIT. I'll give him credit though, he's got so many fuckers hoodwinked, and that shit is BRILLIANT. My hope is that he wins the nom and the presidency and to sit back and watch as all the shit he said he was gonna do...doesn't get done and people get mad @ him and turn on him his 101st day in office. It'll crack my shit up.

Hillary, give it up. You ran the worst campaign that you could have ever run and will go down as the worst campaign EVAH ran. OMG I wouldn't pick Hillary to run a campaign for a toddler in daycare. OMG, she got played like a 3 dollar bill with my dog's picture on it. Her campaign sucked, her campaign leadership sucked, her campaign staff sucked, her PR sucked, her commercials sucked, I don't think there was anything that didn't suck. She sucked. She ruined the presidential aspirations for women for decades to come.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

A PEEP Show for your Easter Enjoyment




This peep diorama was created in April of 2007 by Kate Koop of Crosby, MN.

McCain is CRAZY AS FUCK


....take that shit to your heart people! Know it, repeat it, shout it, sell it, to everyone you know.

I've heard too many intelligent Democrats say shit like, if a Democrat doesn't win, McCain isn't that bad.

YES THE FUCK HE IS!

McCain is crazy. He'd attack KANSAS. He's little. He's old. He's mean. He's crazy as HAYLE.

McCain isn't better than he's equal to or worse than Bush. Just so you know.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Good Morning!

Just so you know, I still don't reallhy give a shit about the Democratic Primary. I don't care. I really don't care enough to vote. But I will vote, just to make sure that McCrazy as fuck doesn't ascend to the WH.

Obama is a politician and is full of shit. He hired a great team of people to convince us that he is the second coming of Jesus Christ.

Clinton is embarrassing herself something fierce and it is because of her it will be decades before a woman is able to run for president again.

I didn't care after the IA caucuses and I don't care now. From my perspective the IA caucuses need to be wiped off the docket. They picked Kerry. That is evidence that I am right.

Anywaze. I'll be back later today with more. I just don't feel like talking politics.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Little Boots to make statement on the economy today


Little Boots aka George W. Bush is going on the teevee today to make a statement about the economy.

The fucker. He's gonna lie, just like he has been for the past 8 years. He thinks his positve messages are going to make us all feel better and convince us that we have more money than we have. He's going to think his magical words and beautiful speech techniques will convince us that milk isn't +$4.00 a gallon. He's hoping his witt will blind us to the fact that gas costs to fucking much. Yes, Little Boots is hoping that his cute face and fake southern demenor (cuz you know his ass is from Connecticut) is going to hokey us in to thinking that he has shit under control.

Bush, Lil Boots, please, don't. Don't interrupt my episodes of Matlock or Murder She Wrote for the shit you spout. I'd rather watch Andy Griffith or Angela Lansbury than your stupid ass.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

The new ugly ass $5 spot is out


I hate it. What are the people @ the treasury who design and approve this shit, blind?

New color $5 bills come out today


WASHINGTON - Abraham Lincoln is getting a little color in his cheeks. New $5 bills bearing the gaunt visage of the nation's 16th president — but with some touches of color added — are making their way to banks and cash registers near you.

The bill goes into circulation Thursday. That's when the Federal Reserve, the supplier of the nation's cash, starts shipping the bills to banks, which send them to businesses and eventually into the hands of people in this country and beyond.

Fittingly, the new bill will be spent for the first time on Thursday at the gift shop of President Lincoln's Cottage located on the grounds of the Armed Forces Retirement Home in northwest Washington.

It's the latest in a series of redesigned notes aimed at foiling phony-money makers, who over the years have grown increasingly sophisticated.

Click here for the rest of the boring info on this ugly ass shit.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

My mother, a 60 year old black woman, who didn't like what Ferraro said proved her point.

We were talking on the phone and she was all like...
I don't like what she said, what she said was racist.

I was like...
Yeah but let's just flip it on it's ear...let's say if Hillary wasn't a Clinton and was a regular old white dude, she'd be out already. She's lucky she's a Clinton and a woman (a white woman).

We went on and on... and THEN SHE SAID...

I DON'T KNOW, I JUST THINK PEOPLE ARE SICK OF WHITE MEN RUNNING THIS COUNTRY...

I replied

AHHHHH HA! YOU JUST PROVED HER POINT. IF OBAMA WAS JUST SOME REGULAR OLD WHITE DUDE.... named Oscar Brennen with the same experience he'd be out too.

(SHE BUSTED A GUT LAUGHING!!!!)

Then I said
Just think, Biden, who I supported over Hillary and Obama has DECADES of experience, he's nice, Putin and other leaders call HIM for advice, he's cool and gives good speeches and his ass was out after the first caucus!

Think, Dodd, DECADES of experience, he's nice, speaks fluent spanish, he's cool, gives good speeches, and his ass was out also.

So, if people are sick of white male dominated government and Obama was just some regular old white dude, he'd be out on his ass with the rest of them.

Then she laughed and said, I always knew you should have been a lawyer.

I guess there is still time...maybe I'll give it a try.

Oh and Hillary would be out too if she was a man and her last name wasn't Clinton. LET'S BE HONEST.

Monday, March 10, 2008

AWWW Fuckeity-fuck fuck-fuckin fuckity fuck fuck.


New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer apologized to his family and the public after a report that tied him to a prostitution ring.

Get the rest of the shit here @ CNN

But the losers over @ DU now think that Hillary Clinton is doomed by this. Why? Cuz they are sexist idiots. Why is a wife or a friend of a man brought down when the fucking idiot man fucks with prostitutes or mistresses?

Can you explain that?

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Fucker Carlson has veen cancelled. WHAT TOOK SO FUCKING LONG!

Insiders tell TVNewser Tucker Carlson's 6pmET show Tucker is getting the axe, but Carlson stays on as a political contributor to all MSNBC shows at least through the 2008 election. The official announcement, expected tomorrow, will include details about who will replace Tucker at 6pmET as well as other political programming additions. Sources say the network is going to beef up its schedule with more NBC News talent.

---SNIP---

Carlson is expected to host the show through next week, with his new role and title to take effect March 17. We're told he'll also be reporting from the campaign trail.

More @ MediaBistro.Com-TV Newser

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

EXCLUSIVE: I know the real reason Hillary hasn't released her tax returns.

Hillary is hiding her tax returns because she has received income from:
  • The BFEE (BUSH FAMILY EVIL EMPIRE
  • Karl Rove
  • Osama Bin Laden
  • Fox News
  • Sean Hannity
  • Focus on the family
  • Fred Thompson
  • Rush Limbaugh
  • John McCain
  • Joe Lieberman
  • Mitt Romney
  • Rudy Guliani
  • Mike Huckabee
  • Ron Paul
  • Tom Delay
  • Bill O'Riley
  • Halliburton
  • Taliban
  • Kim Jun Il
  • Putin
  • Satan
  • The son of Satan
  • The creature from the black lagoon
  • The son of Frankenstein
oh and she's been paying sex
oh and she's been paying for Bill to have sex
oh, and she's been prostituting Chelsea for sex
oh, and she has a hit out on Oprah
oh, and she has had an affair with Jeb Bush

Obama and Clinton Supporters Must Drop Out of the Race

(No truer shit was ever spoken from the lips of a mammal in this galaxy)

I think one thing is clear this far into the Democratic primary race: Both Obama's and Clinton's supporters must now drop out of the race.

Hillary Clinton's supporters have gotten incredibly annoying, with their chants of "Yes She Can," and charges of cultism and their desperate yelps of schadenfreude every time Clinton looks like she might actually be "recapturing the lead" that she never had.

And Obama's supporters, yes, you too are incredibly annoying, with your accusations of Clintonian Republicanism and your whiny little cries about how you're going to take your ball and run home if your candidate doesn't win the primary.

Supporters of both candidates, please listen closely. For the good of the Party -- no, for the good of the Nation! -- the time has come for you to leave this race.

No more late nights in front of MSNBC. No more blogging. No more reading TPM. No more arguing at the watercooler, or at the happy hour after work at TGIF's.

Find a hobby -- knitting is really getting popular these days!

Click here to get the rest of this brilliance.

This is my new one---ROTFFPNMFPLMGDAO

Rolling on the fucking floor peeing in my fucking pants laughing my goddamned ass off.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

My Husband, the Dog Food Taster....Nah just kidding


---Yeah baby, come and give mama a huge wet sloppy Alpo kiss.---

Pedigrees' chum. Meet the man from M&S who tests your pets' ready meals

Like a seasoned wine taster, Simon Allison sniffs and peers at the product he is testing.

Then he samples a soupcon, noting the blend of flavours and aromas.

Only when he is completely satisfied will Marks & Spencer put the dish on the shelves - among the pet foods.

...snip

He insists he relishes the task and has trained his palate to detect the delicacies preferred by dogs and cats - and their owners.

He said: "It is just the same as if I was working in the ready-meals department. I love my job. It is a brilliant area and eating the product is a fundamental part.

"You have to chew it a bit. (yeah I bet you do honey)

Go here to read more

Monday, March 3, 2008

My prediction for the Super Tuesday Primaries. TX,OH, etc...

OBAMA, the messiah will win everything. Hillary, Satan's mother, sister, girlfriend, auntie, lesbian lover, hairdresser will lose and it'll be over.

That about sums it up.

Oh, and I won't be fucking paying any goddamned attention to the shit. I'm using my political psychic abilities to forecast. So, if I'm wrong don't roll back up in this shit posting as such. Email Sylvia Brown, the most wrongest tele-psychic in the world and tell her I request a refund from her 'How to be a TV Psychic and Get Mad Paid Like I Did' seminar.

Nite Y'all.